How to Interest People

You can’t hold attention with what you find fascinating if the other person can’t see themselves in it. Interest is personal.

So start where they already care. What are they responsible for? What do they want more of? What do they fear losing? Speak to those points with concrete details, not grand claims.

This is especially true when you want something—time, agreement, help. Your reasons feel obvious to you; they may be irrelevant to them. Translate your request into their language: benefits, relief, pride, ease.

Interest is also earned by preparation. Learn enough about their world to ask intelligent questions and avoid lazy assumptions. People notice when you did your homework.

When you speak from the other person’s viewpoint, you stop sounding like noise and start sounding like relevance. That is the door to attention—and attention is the doorway to influence.